we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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