fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything