He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Randomize
