You're a womanizer and a bitch.
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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