I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.