I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Randomize
