so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
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