I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
