some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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