I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
