You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
