The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I would ride that face into the sunset
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
