do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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