DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize