she looked like the before picture.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
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