Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I faked an abortion last night.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
