i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
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