Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize