why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize