yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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