i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
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