It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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