He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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