I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
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