So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
These tits shall not be calmed
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
