DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
After last night, I could never be a politician.
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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