im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
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