You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
