She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
