She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
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