Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
