ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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