Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
