wakey wakey hands off snakey
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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