on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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