u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Semen is not good for contacts.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
