Whod you bang
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
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