think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
operation harelip BJ is a go
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
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