I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.