haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
i will never coherently bang her
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
