shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize