Where are you?
In a non slutty way
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Randomize
