He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
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