Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize