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• (407): View more from Florida

  The bars here don't close until 4!

  (703): View more from Virginia

  my legs don't close until 4

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• (408): View more from California

  When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.

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• (571): View more from Virginia

  i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days

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• (862): View more from New Jersey

  watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin

  (1-862): View more from New Jersey

  doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you

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• 

  19 People Did The Wildest Things When They Were Black-Out Drunk

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (540): View more from Virginia

  it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on

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• (718): View more from New York

  The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.

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• (940): View more from Texas

  Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.

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• 

  21 Signs That A Dude is Probably Insane

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (818): View more from California

  Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."

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• (850): View more from Florida

  Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.

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• (916): View more from California

  Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.

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• (856): View more from New Jersey

  AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME

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