Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men