No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize
