I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
