if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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