so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
You were trust falling into bushes
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Randomize
