normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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