YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize